That feeling the following morning after your Arizona Football team loses horribly is like a having a hangover.
It’s hard when your team loses a game, but when you team loses a game like the Arizona football team did late last night, it can be devastating. Fan reaction was harder to read than watch the actual game at times. Can’t lie, we all felt horrible at one point in the game, some earlier than others. That feeling continues into the next morning; it’s like a hangover.
Like a hangover, you feel sick to your stomach, and you just want the feeling to go away. Like a hangover, you feel sad, and you ask yourself, ‘why?’ You ponder the possibility that you never do whatever caused you to feel this way ever again.
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Instead of drinking too much, it’s believing and hoping the Wildcats would win too much. Instead of thinking that you will never drink again, it’s thinking you will never have high expectations for your football team again. Instead of wondering why you had that last drink, you wonder why the team lost. Instead of being mad at the person who bought you that last drink, you wonder who helped you believe that your team had a chance.
Then the anger sets in. Why did I let myself get into that position? Who can I blame other than myself for feeling this way?
Was it the coaches fault? Was it the players? Was it the weather? Was it our quarterback? Did the team execute? Does the team have the heart I thought they had or have they given up on the season and me, the fan? Was it the time of the game? Was it because of injuries or not getting a bye week this season? Is it because all the other schools want our coach?
If your child was having problems performing in school, or playing soccer, or anything else, would you be yelling and screaming and giving up on your child? You cheer for your child, you want them to do wonderfully, but that’s not always possible. So you give loving supportive instructions and advice. You don’t coddle them, you don’t rub salt in the wound, and you don’t tell them you want them out of your family. You know it’s upsetting them more than you.
Michelle Dorson and her dad Photo Credit: Michelle Dorson
Parents sometimes live vicariously through their children and fans live vicariously through their teams. When they fail, you fail. When they are successful, you are successful.
When the Wildcats win, fans may feel victorious, elated, and even find themselves smiling for no reason. It can make your week at work; it can give you reasons to feel proud and buy more Arizona gear.
In contrast, when the Wildcats lose, it’s bedlam. They may feel depressed, or they may have to answer to coworkers or friends who they banter with, and they have to endure all the social media and news media talking about the loss. It just plain stinks!
This feeling is what we call a loss hangover.
Getting over a loss hangover is not easy, and the length of time it takes can take days, weeks, years or never depending on how bad a loss it was and what it means to the school and personally.
How to get over a Loss Hangover:
Step 1- Get over your denial: The first thing you have to do is to get over your denial that the loss even happened. The team lost. Yes they did, they lost.
Step 2- Let it sink in: Allow yourself to feel bad for a little while, after all if you care at all about your team, it hurts.
Step 3- Let yourself be angry for a little bit: Next, get angry! You know the coach and a large amount of the team are upset, the fans should be able to get angry too.
NOTE: During this time, try to refrain from calling for anyone’s head, or making personal attacks on players or coaches on social media, whether you think so or not, they are reading your posts and tweets. So are their parents, family members and friends. If you can’t help yourself and you end up doing this, just know you bring down everyone, and your loss hangover and others hangovers may be prolonged by your actions.
Step 4- Look at the big picture: After the anger dissipates a little bit, start to look at the big picture. If you can’t do this on your own, then talk to people or experts who have a better view of the big picture who are all available on social media. There are plenty of cool heads, especially those close to the program who know the team and coaches personally.
Ask yourself, what player or coach wants to lose a game? Especially who would wish to suffer an embarrassing loss? It’s clear something went wrong, maybe it’s just team chemistry? Maybe the team psyche needs adjusting? Maybe it’s performance anxiety? No team loses to piss off their fans.
Step 5- Try to feel grateful: Take a deep breath. Think about all the good parts of your life, all the people who love you and have your love. If you have a job, great! Some of us don’t.
Do you have your eyesight and hearing? Can you walk? Do you have a roof over your head and food in the Fridge? Fantastic, some of us can’t do those things either. It’s a game with a winner and a loser and just because your team loses, it doesn’t mean you are a loser.
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Step 6- Smile: They say if you smile you will feel happy. Happy people have happy lives. So smile and pat yourself on your back. You are a great fan who loves their team; you stick by them in good times and bad. The next time they are victorious, whether it be this season or next, you will be part of that success. Why? Because you supported your team.
Things to Ponder:
If following these steps did not work, find something to distract yourself from thinking about it. Maybe put on some pads, cleats and a helmet and run into a wall twenty times, see how you feel. If you got concussion from doing that, ask yourself how confident you are to run into that wall again.
It’s college football, these young men are 18-22 years old, some of them living away from home for the first time trying to figure out college life.
It’s the Pac-12, anything can happen, and it’s been proven this season with Oregon beating ASU at home, USC beating undefeated Utah, Wazzu almost beating No. 1 North team Stanford, UCLA almost losing to Colorado. Any given team on any given Saturday can win or lose.
If all else fails, read the Bear Down story and be glad you are alive!
Beardown Fans! Be strong for your team.